Sadness

Do you guys ever those moments, while you just minding your own business, happily kept to yourself/hanging out with yer friends, or just about to fell asleep when suddenly you could feel your fingers turns ice,your mind started racing and there's this aching feeling inside your heart.

 if no then move along, if you have experienced it...well look's like we're in the same boat.

i don't really know what to call it actually,panic attack? i just consider it as one of those "episodes" .  Episode-s. Yeah, i've been experiencing for a few times actually raging from six-eight months back? 

This episodes  just come randomly,with any hint at all, it could strike at anytime,locations and any mood i am in. as i already stated before, the symptoms include ice fingers/hands, irrational thinking(i get down and think worst.....such as suicide...it's that bad), aching pain inside your heart which makes it unbearable and your mind is goes into that mental state where everything bad is caused by you and the upcoming events in your life will be worse.

This post is written to............... i don't even know what it's for, maybe a cry for help? maybe nothing, or maybe letting the world know that i'm sick in the head, or whatever. 

I'm back

Hey guys, how is it going? it's been quite some time since i last posted anything in this blog, due to....i don't really what to call it... maybe life? hahaha, Many things have been happening around me and inside of myself too. You must be surprised to see me post, but hey, life is all about surprises right?

I'm actually quite good and things have been turning for the better in my life. let's see, there's a downward spiral in my life, during my SPM results i think, which is two years ago, and there's been up and down since that, long story short, i am now in Uitm Seri Iskandar, Perak, taking Graphic and i am in my 3rd semester now. haha


anyway, if you guys wanted to know more, just let me know, i'll update soon.

Kids

Kids nowadays are somehow genetically modified to cry and cursed at the slight event that di1dn't favour them in games. If these lit
tle thingscould have crushed them, how will they fare in the unexpected events in life? It's our fault? for spoiling them? Or maybe it's due to the current time, where they felt comfortable with everything handed to them? And to think they will become leaders in the future.

Death from my point of view.

Death is certain for every living being.Some may saw it as the end of one journey,hile others as myself see it as a sign from the higher power to change their live . it's odd, one moment, your families grieves over the death of their family members, and the next, the continued they life like nothing happened. It did, but they had to go back to their lives wether they want it or not. We humans  are known to adapt to survives so we just had continued with our lifemand soon those deaths that hadhappened arounds us are kept away in the farthest corners of our memories which waiting to be remembered again as it consumed by time and slowly but surely became a faint memory and thus forgotten untill we experience it ourselves.

Mixed feelings

Lately, i have this mixed feelings towards my crush. Some days i just can't forget about her, and the feeling of this emptiness in my heart, while the other days,i just couldn't care less about her.  i guess this's what happened with all my ex-crushes. One day i just can't stopthinking 'bout them and the next was nothing, as i don't find you attractive anymore.

Maybe it's because i haven't seen her in a while and my brain needed to refresh back what's like to fall head over heels towards her, again. Or maybe this is from The Almighty Himself showing me my true feelins or another test of Him. Who knew??
Anyway i've been thinking these past few days, maybe i just dont found anything attractive about her anymore, andsome how really, truly understand the song MCR -I Don't Love You really meant.

Maybe i just need a break from the city and it's time for fresh air, that's why i'm going back to my grandma house (like i have a choice) and enjoyed a more simple life, and no more chores. Maybe that's my body needs, a break.

ok, thanks for reading. hope i don't bore you to death with my ongoing writting and all.

That awkward moment when ........

when your whole family knew your crush's name. Oh God, Why??


the other day, my brother's phone somehow broke, and since i have 2 phones, n70(hotlink) and X3(digi),i decidedto lent him my n70 because i rarely used it. guess what?? the next day i forgot that i set an alarm for reminded the time to sent a message to my crysh to wish her for her birthday.  he saw it and started to tell on my mom. it's so embarassing when my mom found out.


i just kept calm and remained pokerface for the next week and deny,deny,deny when she asked me who (insert name here) is.

i'm back

hey guys, guess who's back? Me!!! it's good to have the luxury of being able to online again, thanks to mymom for buying a tab for the whole family. Alhamdullillah~ thanks mom!!

okay, for the past 2 years, i have grown a lot thanks to the bittersweetmoments in my life, but without the emotional roller coaster that every single one of us had to endure sooner or later, it make me more mature somehow. maybe that's life, all of us had to grow up one way or another. kay, herei again ranting bout it.

anyway it'sgood to be back. do expect me to frequently update this blog. oh yeah, i would like to apologise for my broken engrish, Xp not all of us asians are blessed with good vocabularies.

BitterSweet Moment

Okay semalam ade Gathering yang dianjurkan oleh kelas B2STARI sendiri. Semalam memang best gile kot sebab kite semua bergembira...tapi sebelum kegembiraan ade lah ujian daripada Illahi yang memang nak patahkan semangat kiteorang nih lah ujian-ujian daripada DIA.

1. Kena "halau" dengan budak-budak form 3 disebabkan oleh ketidak-efisien pihak Kedai
2. Terpaksa merapat-rapat dekat meja luar tepi tempat tertutup yang dimana kami dihalau. 
3. Tengok budak-budak lelaki lain pakai baju t-shirt (aku pulak pakai baju melayu lol malu gile)
4. Yang pihak "menghalau" adalah pelajar-pelajar tusen yang aku sekarang tengah bercuti dari.
5. Menghabiskan masa kira-kira 45 minit beratur dan mengutuk-kutuk kedai tersebut. 
6. Berbuka puasa semasa beratur.
7. Kena bakar balik lemak yang aku telah consume semasa makan dan melantak makanan dan air orang.

Muke aku masa kena halau.

Tapi lepas itu semuanya okay! :D

1. Kedatangan cikgu K dan Cikgu A telah hampir buat aku tak kutuk  pihak kedai dengan lebih teruk lagi (yelah tu) 
2. Dapat merapatkan diri dengan kawan sekelas aku masa sesi mengata pihak kedai.
3. Dapat melantak  Double ***. Pergghh!!! sedap gile...walaupun aku makan dalam keaadan yang marah dan gembira masa tu.
4. Sesi CamWhore dan Ambil gambar bermula!!!!! 
5. Sesi Aegyo bermula dengan dak-dak lain.
6. Kedua-dua cikgu sporting gila!!!
7. Dapat Bergambar dengan Si Dia!!!
8. F tahu rahsia aku dan tolong amik gambar dengan Dia.(situasi ini membuat aku rasa malu gile)
9. Dapat "Melantak" *******. 
10. Claim Free Refill!!! Woohoo!!!!
11. Dengar kisah-kisah hantu dengan cikgu.
12. Dapat FB cikgu K!!!!! yeah!!!!
13. Dapat merapakat hubungan silaturahim dengan semua orang yang hadir semalam!!!!
14. Ambik gambar gune ipad dan bukak FB gune Ipad. You Jelly? 
15. Still lagi mengata pihak kedai dan "penghalau"(tapi sikit jer...sekarang)
16. Pergi dan balik tumpang kawan dan mempunyai abang yang Sporting gile!!!

Seperti yang korang dapat lihat, sebelum kegembiraan mesti ade kesedihan dan penderitaan. LOL
Tapi masa amik gambar tu yang paling best!!!! 

Masa amik gambar kiteorang semua

Saja buat macam menyeronokkan masa amik gambar sehingga membuat bising sampai buat kiteorang macam lagi best daripada diorang kat dalam tu.

                                                                  "You Jelly?"

Sunny Hill

Okay, today i want to share with you guys about the group that's called Sunny Hill. Although they are not an idols but they are really talented and their music and mv are inspiring to me. So here's a little info bout them.


Originally comprised of 3 members (Jang Hyun, Seung Ah, and Joobi), a organisation suggested a fourth member named ‘Kota‘ recently, who was a partial of a ‘Narsha Group‘ with Brown Eyed Girls‘ Narsha for her single, “Mamma Mia.” Shortly thereafter, they combined a fifth member, named ‘Misung.’ Plus they are from Loent Entertainment.

Now, they made a comeback with Midnight circus and lately with Pray.  I suggest that you don't watch the Mv of Pray first because the Mv somehow tells a story bout an irony of people calling the "thing" ugly but they guys are pretty and doing some evil and twisted things towards the "thing"


This is Midnight Circus 

This is Pray.

2ne1

Okay, Today i want to write about my latest favourite K-POP Group which is 2ne1. Lately they had made a comeback with the song that i just loved listen to which is

1.  I Am The Best 
2.  Lonely 
3.  Hate You
4. Ugly.   

 Okay this is "I Am The Best" +  Lyrics

2 - " Lonely" + Lyrics

3- Hate You + Lyrics 

4 - Ugly + Lyrics

                  

Infinite ( Infinity)

Okay.Today i want to share with you the Biography of the Members Infinite. Did you guys know that Korean Fan actually called Infinite as in Infinity. Credit to My friend Cheah. Guess who's my bias in Infinite?

SUNGGYU (Leader & Main Vocal)
Name: Kim Sung Gyu (김성규)
Birthdate: 04/28/89
Height: 178cm
Blood Type: A
Hobbies: Watching movies, listening to music.
Talent: Speaking Chinese
Twitter: http://twitter.com/leadergyu

DONGWOO (Rapper)
Name: Jang Dong Woo (장동우)
Birthdate: 11/22/90
Height: 175cm
Blood Type: A
Hobbies: Skateboarding.
Talent: Beatboxing, snowboarding.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/ddww1122

WOOHYUN (Main Vocal)
Name: Nam Woo Hyun (남우현)
Birthdate: 02/08/91
Height: 176cm
Blood Type: B
Hobbies: Skiing, tennis.
Talent: Cooking
Twitter: http://twitter.com/wowwh

HOYA (Vocal,Rap & Dance)
Name: Lee Ho Won (이호원)
Birthdate: 03/28/91
Height: 178cm
Blood Type: AB
Hobbies: Playing games.
Talents: Dance, rap.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/hoya1991

SUNGYEOL(Vocal)
Name: Lee Sung Yeol (이성열)
Birthdate: 08/27/91
Height: 180cm
Blood Type: B
Talent: Rap.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/seongyeol1991 
Me2day: http://me2day.net/seongyeol199
Cyworld: http://cyworld.com/Infinite_Lsy


L (Vocal & Face of Infinite)
Name: Kim Myung Soo (김명수)
Birthdate: 03/13/92
Height: 178cm
Blood Type: O
Hobbies: Cooking, exercise, rap.
Talent: Rap.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/INFINITELKIM


SUNGJONG (Vocal, Maknae)
Name: Lee Sung Jong (이성종)
Birthdate: 09/03/93
Height: 177cm
Blood Type: A
Twitter: http://twitter.com/infiniteyounges

the info's are credit to from their facebook fan pages.

Plus the make their comeback with a new song called BE MINE.  So Enjoy! XD +

formspring.me

Ask away! bishes http://formspring.me/Aqibk

Sehening Kota Melbourne

Okay, aku ade benda nak share dengan korang, kawan aku nih, iaitu Shafikah Nizam dan "adik" aku nih telah membuat novel yang bertajuk Sehening Kota Melbourne dan korang sila-sila-lah baca dan menyokong kawan aku nih,  Sehening Kota Melbourne

Si dia.

Okay, blog aku hari ini adalah sebagai luahan hati sahaja. Aku ada suka kawan aku sorang nih, mungkin sebab aku rasa yang tiada satu pon perempuan yang macam die.  okay biar aku senaraikan kenapa aku suka dekat die.

1. die mempunyai minat yang sama dengan aku.
2. die bukan seorang yang suke 'judge' orang berdasarkan minat mereka.
3. die sorang yang pandai dalam kelas.
4. baik hati dan memahami.
5. aku rasa selesa cakap dengan die walaupun ade masanya aku rasa janggal nak cakap dengan die.
6. die telah mengajar aku dan berjaya menghasut aku dalam meminati sesuatu genre music yang dulu aku tak dengar.
7. die tinggi sikit daripada budak-budak lain dalam kelas aku. 

Aku banyak kali menyusahkan diri die tadi die cool je dan sekarang nih... die jatuh sakit.. buat aku rasa risau je dengan keadaan dia. Semoga die cepat sembuh. Ameen.

Perbarisan/Kawad kaki

Ok, biar aku berterus terang kenapa aku masuk perbarisan tahun ini.

• Saja je nak bagi Rumah Hang Tuah menang(padahal nak lari daripada berjumpa dengan Pn. Loh.). 
• Aku nak melatih aku punya disiplin.
• Menjadi seorang yang 'team player'(padahal aku diri cam tunggul jer ignore semua orang) 
• Dapat melatih diri aku yang Socially Awkward ini supaya biasa dengan kehadiran orang-orang yang aku tidak kenal(padahal aku jadi invisible dan tak tegur pon orang). 

Keburukannya pulak adalah,

• Aku menjadi semakin jahat dalam mengutuk orang lain dan mengata orang tentang kesalahan yang mereka lakukan.(padahal aku tak sedar diri banyak kali salah step tapi tengok kesalahan orang jer)
• Aku dapat Sunburn yang paling teruk sehingga kulit muka aku menjadi seperti arang(ceh, aku nih bukannye putih sangat pon. sila baling batu)
• Aku menyusahkan orang lain sehingga mereka kena denda termasuk diri aku sekali.( aku adalah 'Black Hole" yang menyedut semua orang masuk . Tumbuklah muka aku sekarang.)

Hari Sukan Sekolah.

Okay, korang dah tahu kan hari ini hari ape, bukan hari sabtu ke ape tapi hari sukan bagi SMKBBSB. Hari merupakan hari yang aku tunggu-tunggu kan sejak aku join perbarisan Rumah Hang Tuah. Pada mulanya kami dinasihati(padahal kena marah) oleh cikgu2 kerana Rumah Hang Tuah kerana budak-budak pagi tak sumbangkan apa-apa untuk Rumah Hang Tuah. Oleh kerana semangat nak menang, Kiteorang berlatih bersungguh-sungguh pada setiap hari.  Hari kami dipenuhi oleh penat dan sakit kaki yang tak terhingga(di-hiperbola) sakitnya semasa sesi latihan untuk Kawad Kaki, tetapi makan lama kami makin risau kerana macam tinggal beberapa hari je lagi untuk Hari Sukan dan Persembahan tak siap pape. Tapi pada last-last minute kami sempat jugak praktis untuk persembahan dan tengok kami dapat no.3 untuk Perbarisan dan Menang untuk Keselurahan Hari Sukan.  Allhamdullilah.

Masa waktu Hang Tuah dinobatkan sebagai Juara tadi, hilang penat dan rasa sakit kaki(disebabkan oleh adrenaline) dan kiteorang tergedik-gedik melompat macam menang loterti dan menjerit-jerit walaupun dah takde suara.

Lady gaga

Secara jujurnye, aku memang pernah anggap yang Lady Gaga nih sebagai idol aku dulu, tetapi sekarang tak lagi. Mungkin sebab die selalu sokong hak-hak orang gay/lesbian dan suke menunjukkan dienye boobs tapi aku tak kisah sebenarnya walaupun die hot tapi aku lebih suke masa die masa lagu-lagu lama die dulu seperti
Just Dance, Pokerface, Paparazzi dan Speechless. tapi makin lama aku rasa makin tak suke dia aku pon x tahu kenapa.

-Sigh-

Last Tuesday, i have received my English lit. paper, I failed it greatly yet gracefully at the same time. well i got 34 and i'm the highest one out of three person whom failed. not to mention the other 2 person whom failed the test also my classmate. what's more infuriating is that the EL teacher at first like commented me then she commented one of my friend's paper that had the lowest mark but then said i'm just got lucky to have 34.
-sigh-
thanks for the "motivation". F You.  

Cerita hantu.

Sejak kebelakangan ini, aku telah mendengar banyak citer hantu dprd kawan aku nih, die merupakan kawan aku sejak sekolah rendah dulu, dan kami telah terpisah apabila aku melangkau ke dunia remaja(ceh, padahal baru masuk tingkatan 1 je, tu pon masih lagi kanak-kanak ribena) 

Sejak aku masuk tingkatan 4 nih, aku telah ditemukan dengan die kembali(lololololol, cam lain je ayat die) apabila die telah memasuki Pusat Tusen Mawar(promote). Pada mulanya, aku memang kenal die, tapi aku saja je buat tak kenal sebab aku pon tak pasti yang die masih ingat aku lagi ke tak. Pastu die masih kenal aku lagi(ade event tapi malas nak taip).

Akhirnya, aku telah mendengar cerita-cerita dan die punya Pengalaman die berkenaan dengan Paranormal. Aku nih sebenarnye agak penakut sikit dan aku paling tak suka hantu + aku nih memang tak pernah ade pengalaman dengan  hantu-hantu nih.

Die citer lah semua pengalaman die dan sejak kebelakangan nih, aku makin lama makin minat pulak kisah-kisah Paranormal ini tapi dalam masa yang sama, aku jugak semakin takut dengan hantu....... XO

Umrah,

okay, Hari ini merupakan hari yang agak sedih bagi kau kerana aku baru sahaja menemani nenek aku ke KLIA untuk menunaikan Umrah.  Nenek aku pergi Umrah bersama-sama dengan Paksu, Pakteh dan juga nenek cousin2 aku.
Tolong Doakan mereka selamat sampai.